2000 Days ‘Til the End of the World
1000 Days ‘Til the End of the World
500 Days ‘Til the End of the World
100 Days ‘Til the End of the World
The World Ended Yesterday
The Gospel of Dieting: How Jesus Christ Lost Forty Pounds in Forty Days
From Peeing in the Shower to Showering After Peeing: How to Transform Your Slovenly Man Into an Obsessive Compulsive Metrosexual
The Seuss Code: The Hidden Messages Contained in the Works of Dr. Seuss, and How You Can Use Them to Hear Horton’s Who
The World’s Healthiest Food: (Hint: It Costs $398 an Ounce, and I’m the Only One Who Sells It)
How I Achieved Optimal Health by Not Drinking My Own Urine
Eliminating Clutter: (Start By Throwing Away This Book)
Manure Propaganda: Why Everything You’ve Ever Heard About Horseshit is Bullshit
Using the Side of Your Fork as a Knife
Buy Low, Sell Lower: A Guide to Reverse Profit Stock Market Investing
Brando, DeNiro, Pacino: Why You Should Add an O to Your Last Name
O’Reilly, Olbermann, O’Donnell: Why You Should Drop an O from Your Last Name
My Life and Times Collecting Time and Life Magazines
The A-Z Guide to the Letter L
The Z-A Guide to Bizarro World
The A-G Guide to H Through Z
Advanced Shoe Tying Techniques
The Othernet: How to Access the Secret Internet Using a Vintage Monopoly Board, Two Scoops of Raisins, and Four Hundred and Twenty Seven Rolls of Pink Toilet Paper
On the Wealth of Nations, And How to Screw Them Out of It
Ask What Your Country Should Do For You… NOT!
Doo-Doo, Cah-Cah, or Poo-Poo?: How to Tell the Difference
I’m 21 and She’s 17; She Lives in New Jersey, I Live in Tennessee, We Met in Florida During Spring Break, and We’re Vacationing in Connecticut: A Guide to United States Statutory Rape Laws
The Seven Hundred and Seventy Seven Habits of Highly Successful Gamblers
The Zero Habits of Highly Successful Corpses
Eat Fruit, Live Longer
Live Longer, Eat Fruit
How I Didn’t Make Millions in Real Estate
How I Didn’t Make Billions in Real Estate
How I Didn’t Make Trillions in Real Estate
The Buck Stops Here: Going Out of Your Way to Take Responsibility
Get the Buck Out of Here!: Going Out of Your Way to Avoid Responsibility
Jesus Loves You. No… I Meant the Guy Behind You
Jesus Loves You—But He Thinks You Should Find Another Religion. It’s Not You—It’s Him
Convincing Your Wife to Hire a Sexy Young Babysitter—Even if You Don’t Have Any Children
Oxygen: Do We Really Need It?
The American Civil War: Why It Had Absolutely Nothing to do with Tacos
500 Punchlineless Jokes
500 Joke Punchlines
How to Tell Time Using Three Mangoes, Four Bananas, and Five Wristwatches
Only for the Mad: Why a Sane Country Won’t Elect James Madison
DeWitt is the Shit: Why Madison Won’t Repeat
A Whig Will Win: Why Van Buren’s a No Hoper
A Whig Won’t Win: Why Van Buren Will Repeat
Honestly Insane: Why Lincoln Will Lose
By George, He’s Got It: Why Lincoln Won’t Repeat
It Won’t B. Hayes
I Ain’t Lyin’—Our Pres. Will Be Bryan
I’m Not McKidding This Time—Bryan Will Win
Teddy’s Not Ready, I’m Picking Parker
3rd Time’s a Charm: Why Bryan Will Top Taft
FDR Won’t Go Far: Why We’ll Give a Damn About Hoover
The Shmuck Stops Here: Why FDR Will Lose to Landon
Willkie Will Win, Frankie Will Tank
In with Dewey, Roosevelt’s Screwy
We’re Not Wild About Harry: Why Dewey Will Dominate
Eisenhower Won’t Be in Power
The End of Ike’s Reich
Nixon TKO JFK
Uprooting a Dirty Bush: Why Dukakis Can’t Lose
Read My Lips: Bush Will Be Reelected
Read My Lips: Clinton Cheated
Why Kerry Will Kick Bush’s Tush
Elvis in ‘08